Pathwork Lecture #72: The Fear of Loving

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #72:
The Fear of Loving

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P072.PDF

Everything comes down to love. Love is the ultimate power in the Universe. It makes us powerful and safe. However, we can not have this power and safety until we DISCOVER and understand our internal resistance to loving. This requires a willingness to experience our fear of loving directly, rather than merely acknowledging it as an abstraction.

One reason we fear loving is that our inner child demands total submission from others, understanding this to be love. At times when we sell ourselves out to get “love” we believe we cannot do without, we reinforce this misunderstanding of what love is (not realizing that even though it appears we have made the other the center of our universe, we have done so only in order to satisfy our own needs, which remain paramount). Naturally, we do not want to give this same submission to others. We will be more able to give love when we realize that it does not mean giving up dignity, autonomy and freedom. Giving others freedom will help us to anticipate mature love in return. This way of loving keeps us free.

Our inner child has a black and white approach to things, and withdraws when it is thwarted or cannot create a “great drama.” A more mature approach to creating loving relationships is to proceed gradually, perhaps beginning by giving others sincere inner permission not to like us or submit to our will. We would do well to GET IN TOUCH with our forcing current, and LET IT GO, along with the hostility we feel towards others for not complying.

Because we are subtly aware that we have invested in a false picture of the other person (out of a childish conviction that willing something can make it so), we trust neither our own judgment nor the other person. This situation inhibits the functioning of our intuition. When we face reality, our intuition becomes more reliable, and we can trust ourselves more. Moreover, we become more fully alive, perceptive and creative.

Questions and Answers:

We can instruct the unconscious, but must do so without attempting to force. Instruction should be about facing one’s self and one’s misunderstandings. It is important to avoid superimposing right reactions on still-deviating emotions, and to be patient with the growth process. All of this applies as well to prayer, which should be directed not up into the sky, but deep within ourselves to the “divine spark.”

In order to understand that we each create our own fate, we must explore our subconscious minds. Humanity will slowly achieve unity as self-responsibility and the unconscious creative currents are understood.

When we do not understand self-responsibility, the child within us relates to self-management as something unknown and fear-provoking, rather than the privilege and freedom it really is. The unknown ceases to be frightening when it is faced. Fear of the unknown is behind the desire to create dogma, when truth is in fact alive and necessarily flexible. This flexibility does not create danger. When we lean on a fixed rule, we shift responsibility to the rule in order to avoid the fear of having to decide how to behave. The inflexible or fixed rule is for the child who is unable or afraid to assume self-responsibility, because he does not know and trust his or her self.

Scriptural “fear” of God is meant to convey “respect,” not fear.

While the type of “patience” which covers inertia is not useful, impatience and its concomitant tension hinder growth.

© 2007 — All rights reserved (see first post in general orientation category).

Pathwork Lecture #71: Reality and Illusion

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #71: Reality and Illusion

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P071.PDF

We gain knowledge of reality by becoming aware of our misconceptions and the illusory reality they create. Our ability to gain this knowledge depends on our maturity, which depends in turn on our willingness to love. The less mature we are, the more we will fear loving (perhaps in part out of fear of losing our dignity by giving away legitimate needs and loving without reciprocation), and the more we will desire to be loved in spite of this fear. One who is willing to love will still desire to receive love, but without so much tension and urgency.

Recognizing that we have a problem in this area is the initial step — afterwards it is easy to see how unfair it is to ask for more than we are willing to give. We need to NOTICE telltale resistance we may have to seeing this tendency in ourselves.

When someone hurts us, we remain hurt only until we fully understand, at which point the truth sets us free. Our resistance to truth is based on the illusion that resistance is advantageous, but while maintaining illusion brings stress, fatigue and misery, accepting reality brings happiness and freedom.

The urgent desire for love and approval can lead us to construct unrealistically favorable images of people and situations, and to over-value events which appear consistent with our illusion. When reality does not live up to our expectations, we subtly feel disappointment, followed by hostility which then produces reactions in others which destroy the illusion. As a result, we adopt a subjective, all-black perspective. This would not occur if we approached people and situations flexibly.

It is crucial to BECOME AWARE of these feelings of disappointment (observing them without judgment), as well as the childish forcing energy we apply to making our illusion happen. To the extent that we let go of the forcing current, we are able to receive and benefit from whatever there is to receive.

Our state of illusion causes us to see people as all good when they support our illusion and all bad when they don’t. Our image of others may be based on real aspects of their personalities, but we blow these aspects out of proportion, and lose sight of the transient nature of others’ emotional reactions, and of our own reactions to others. As we mature, we gain detachment and we are able to keep the passing importance of an event in mind even as we are feeling its emotional impact in the moment.

Every one of us is to some extent involved in self-dramatization — that is, exaggerating the emotional importance of events. When we exaggerate the importance of positive things, this sets us up for greater disappointments. When we exaggerate the importance of negative things, we are seeking sympathy, attention or support from others.

Dealing with the inner child’s disappointment (which can manifest as depression) by working to mature the inner child brings self-respect, which in turn diminishes our need for approval from others and diminishes the forcing current. The maturing process is facilitated when we see how our hostility and aggressiveness have provoked reactions in others.

Daydreaming about the way we would like a relationship to go fuels a destructive vicious cycle in that it represents an investment in an illusion of instant gratification, leading to emanations of hostility when the unrealistic fantasy isn’t fulfilled. Without this hostility, something real can slowly develop. We would do well to FIND how our fear of love causes us to withdraw, and how this produces guilt and emptiness which make us need to force others to love us as compensation.

Letting go of the forcing current allows others to feel about us as they truly feel, and this is mature love and respect. With our own inner freedom and the freedom we give others, we are able to experience the real situation in a deep and meaningful way.

The misconception that love is a submission to another’s will makes us fluctuate between connection which is distorted by submission on the one hand and withdrawal and consequent guilt on the other.

It is best to live in the now, as it truly is, as opposed to trying to pretend that it is, or force it to be, something else. Non-thinking meditation is helpful, but it is also essential to explore one’s self.

We need to become aware of resistance we have to meditation — to see that the impatient haste we bring to it is an illusion, particularly considering all the time we waste daydreaming. We can help ourselves achieve detachment in meditation by simply observing ourselves physically — our clothes, posture, expression, etc. When we are able to stay with non-thinking for a little while, it is a good time to pray or instruct our subconscious.

© 2007 — All rights reserved (see first post in general orientation category).

Pathwork Lecture #70: Questions and Answers

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #70: Questions and Answers

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P070.PDF

Love cannot be forced, but grows organically when obstacles are removed. Love is objectivity; subjectivity and self-centeredness and love cannot coexist. We are subjective towards others in the sense that we magnify their negative aspects when they react negatively towards us. We develop towards the right way of giving and receiving love by recognizing:
(1) our substitute emotions which find gratification through the subtle current of forcing others to love us — mostly by trying to make an impression on them, and by proving ourselves in some way;
(2) our subjective outlook, hidden in our emotional reactions, which makes us unable to give love, insofar as we can only love so long as others do not hurt us, while we pridefully demand that others love us unconditionally;
(3) our world of illusions wherein we are terrified of being rejected;
(4) the effect which all of this distortion has on our personality and on our surroundings.

Essentially, all of this self-recognition leads to genuine acceptance of and compassion for others, even when they reject or displease us — their actions will no longer bring out the worst in us. No longer will we be swinging between extremes of withdrawal and attempting to force others to love. We will have love for those who are capable of mature love, but when others are not ready for a loving relationship, we will quietly withdraw without losing respect for them as children of God.

Sickness can be related to one’s surroundings by all sorts of subtle, subconscious associations. It may be that sickness disappears in more difficult surroundings, which the higher self recognizes as being more favorable to spiritual development. Sickness may also be connected to being in the proximity of persons with whom one has negative psychic connections. In part, sickness results from weakening due to inner tensions, which brings about fear of life and desire for sickness and death. When emotions and the thinking process integrate in Truth, then the will to live becomes stronger.

The real meaning of the Sabbath is that there needs to be time (not necessarily on any particular day) devoted to self-development and spirituality. The Sabbath is meant to give us rest and let us regather strength, which can only come from God. In addition to “rest,” the word “Sabbath” also means “seven,” which is the number associated with the completion of one cycle, the gaining of perspective, and the beginning of the next cycle. While this is symbolized on Earth by seven-day weeks, there is in reality no regular interval to the organic cycles of growth.

Ritual is meaningless on one level, but can serve an important purpose nevertheless as a symbol and reminder. Following a ritual in an automatic way is not a substitute for achieving the state of mind the ritual is meant to cultivate. Blindly rejecting rituals misses the point of what rituals have to offer.

Despite our image of God as demanding that we sacrifice our happiness, the truth is that we can find God within ourselves only when we are happy. This does not refer to happiness out of selfishness; however, selfishness is to be abandoned out of greater understanding, not out of a sense of compulsion.

We appear to fall back at times in our development because despite our new partial insights, we lack an overall integrated consciousness. “Relapses” should be viewed with patience, as opportunities for growth.

Shyness, such as a reluctance to ask the questions one desires to ask, results from shame at one’s inner struggle, and a preference for appearing to have it all together.

While the existence of favorable conditions in an undeveloped person’s life reflects some positive spiritual quality that the person carries, it should not be interpreted as meaning that such person is deeply happy. Believing that others must be happier than we are is a symptom of immaturity and separateness.

© 2007 — All rights reserved (see first post in general orientation category).

Pathwork Lecture #69: The Folly of Watching for Results While on the Path; Fulfillment or Suppression of the Valid Desire to be Loved

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #69:
The Folly of Watching for Results While on the Path; Fulfillment or Suppression of the Valid Desire to be Loved

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P069.PDF

Being on the path does not prevent us from experiencing life’s ups and downs. Our inner situations are complicated, and our efforts may be obstructed by inner resistance and barriers. Moreover, recognition is not the same as change, although constant recognition over time will eventually replace ingrained soul habits with new patterns.

Inner change is best determined by one’s reaction to times of trouble. The mature approach is to accept them, and to learn from them whatever one can, by seeking to understand how we have brought the difficulty about, albeit perhaps very subtly and perhaps a long time ago. It is our approach to hard times which is the yardstick of our progress, not the fact that hard times continue to come to us through the law of cause and effect (which incidentally tends to operate more quickly when one is on the path). And our approach may be mature on the surface and yet still childish underneath our affectation of calm. We may also deceive ourselves regarding the extent of our will to change by shifting our effort into helping others, or by using outer effort in order to camouflage inner resistance.

Life is a school, and the fluctuating positive and negative circumstances of our lives make up the curriculum.

Being on the path does not attract more difficulties than not being on the path. When less developed people have it easy, this is part of a natural rhythm of hard and easy times, which can sometimes remain easy for an extended period. And it is not true that the path “does not work” because negative karmic effects continue to manifest in one’s life. If, for instance, things get much worse right after one starts on the path, it may be that one unconsciously knew this moment of negative manifestation was approaching and wanted to be prepared for it.

We would do well to GIVE UP the unfair demand for maximum change in return for minimal effort. When we do so, we receive divine help.

Questions and Answers:

Doing the inner work of the path does bring positive results. The point of the above discussion is just that negative karma will also continue to play out.

Physical health is related to the extent to which one is able to let go of self-will and the tension it produces.

**** Transition To Another Subject ****

The desire to be loved is legitimate and healthy, and leads to creativity.

The desire for love is unproductively distorted because the child’s experience that his or her desire for unlimited love is “bad” is generalized to desiring love at all. So the longing is buried out of shame (at a great energetic cost), and expressed in devious ways which produce failure and the misconception that such failure reflects a lack of worth.

One distortion of the desire to be loved is the desire to shine, to be better and more important than others. Another is the tendency to conform and obey, and then to resent. All of this makes us unlovable, as we fight for unsatisfying “proof” of our worthiness as a substitute for what we really want, instead of sincerely expressing our longing for loving connection. We need to ALLOW the feeling of longing and sadness, without relating to it as a humiliation, whereupon we will realize that it is not our self which is unlovable, but the superimposed layer of striving. We will also see how futile and counterproductive the striving actually is, because it is not genuine. We must step into the abyss of our fear and shame around all of this in order to be liberated.

Questions and Answers:

Getting past these patterns requires feeling the emotions at work. We would do well to FIND the compulsion to “prove,” the forcing current which insists on love. If we PERMIT people not to love us, then we will enjoy love as freely given. We should try to be generous in giving others the freedom to feel what they feel.

© 2007 — All rights reserved (see first post in general orientation category).

Pathwork Lecture #068: Suppression of Positive and Creative Tendencies — Thought Process

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #068:
Suppression of Positive and Creative Tendencies — Thought Process

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P068.PDF

The Lectures so far have been concerned mainly with facing repressed negative aspects of our personalities. However, positive tendencies are also suppressed, and getting in touch with these and allowing them to express is also part of personal development. We would do well to GET IN TOUCH with the misconceptions which prohibit the expression of our best tendencies.

It would be productive to LOOK at our tendency to suppress our spirituality, even if we have made progress in that area, at our tendency to go to defiance and rebellion when it isn’t necessary, and at the fear and shame we have about the higher aspects of ourselves. We would also do well to OBSERVE how our dependency on the approval of others causes us to sell ourselves short and suffer.

Organized religion is too overgeneralized and dogmatic to serve the spiritual needs of unique individuals. Our culture has dogmas as well, such as materialism. Bending to these dogmas causes suffering.

When we incarnate, we carry within us a life plan. When we deviate from it in order to conform, our development is stifled and we suffer.

In addition to adding a focus on the positive aspects of the self, upcoming Lectures will also consider the thought process in addition to the emotions. We will learn thought control without rigidity and suppression.

Foreground thought is voluntary; background thought is involuntary, disorganized and largely unconstructive. Background thought material consists of symptoms of emotional conflicts and disturbances; fragmentary re-experiencing of events, conversations or impressions; and wishful thinking. We would do well to exercise thought control not by suppressing background thought, but by bringing it into the foreground for evaluation. This practice liberates personal energy and raises consciousness. Rather than letting our minds wander and get ensnared by background thought, which tires us, we should either bring these thoughts into the foreground for evaluation or else allow the mind to be calm and rest.

The upcoming Lectures will focus on continuing to find and dissolve images; unleashing suppressed creativity; and understanding and learning to control the thought process.

It is productive to SIT quietly and comfortably for 5 minutes, twice a day and meditate, focusing either on the breath or on a point between the eyes, and just OBSERVE the nonvolitional thoughts which come in. This material may be analyzed right away or later. This exercise will help one to become aware of one’s thoughts, and to be able to calm the mind. It will also improve vitality, memory, the power of concentration and the effectiveness of inner will. The exercise should be done calmly — if there is a preoccupation with something, there may be a need to work out what it is about before doing the exercise.

As preparation for the upcoming Lectures, we would do well to think about times when we might not have followed a positive, creative impulse and ask ourselves whether we were concerned about external approval, or whether the wish might have been partially based on unhealthy motives which produced guilt. Does the desire disappear without the unhealthy component, or is it based on a deep, essential aspect of who we are?

Questions and Answers:

When we discover negative motivations which have led us to suppress positive creative tendencies, we experience joy and liberation.

© 2007 — All rights reserved (see first post in general orientation category).

Pathwork Lecture #067: Questions and Answers

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #067: Questions and Answers

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P067.PDF

Regarding the Tree of Immortality in Genesis, we cannot experience a definite knowledge of immortality while we are on the Earth plane. Moreover, as long as we are on this plane, we must experience not only physical death, but the many emotional “deaths” that come from darkness, disappointment, hurt and so forth.

Regarding fear, the more we come to understand and accept self-responsibility, the more we know that we are not at the mercy of random coincidence. Mishaps are the result of inner will functioning in a self-destructive way, on the basis of unconscious tendencies and wishes. Safety lies in understanding how these tendencies and wishes do not actually serve us. When we do this work, we no longer need to fear ourselves. ASK “Why do I fear this particular mishap as opposed to all the others which could befall me?” For instance, a fear of being murdered, as opposed to other forms of death, may be a fear of being helplessly exposed to an evil force. The healthy attitude towards inevitable pain and death is to trust that we will be able to handle it when it comes, knowing that we will not be asked to bear more than we are able.

The struggle between communism and capitalism was a mirror of the struggle in the souls of individuals. Both sides were wrong to an extent, but communism more so in that it focused on materialism and devalued the individual. Communism undermined the individual’s self-responsibility, which is spiritually the most harmful thing possible.

“Salvation can ultimately lie only in self-development.” One who is on the Path always looks first to his or her own contribution to a conflict. This brings a certain detachment. We must all do this, but especially those in power must do so. A time will come when extensive self-development will be a prerequisite to assuming positions of responsibility.

Some times the karmic effects of one incarnation are not worked through until later incarnations, because the soul piles on additional complications in the intervening incarnations. It is not until an incarnation when the soul resolves the added layers of complication that it becomes possible to go back to the earlier leftover issues. Also, sometimes good karma does not become available until an incarnation when it will not act as a hindrance to development. (This is to be distinguished from spiritual knowledge, which one always keeps once one has acquired it.)

Sometimes healthy, positive energies can paradoxically add to a distortion in another area of a person’s life.

Hypnotism is neither good not bad in and of itself. What matters are the motives with which it is used. There is the greatest potential for negativity when the hypnotist’s negative motives are unrecognized. But even if a hypnotist has shadow motives, such as a desire to control others, a subject can not be negatively affected except to the extent that his or her self-destructiveness calls forth the negative energy of the hypnotist.

If hypnotism is used to alleviate symptoms without seeking to understand them, then to that extent it is negative.

Post-hypnotic suggestion can not have lingering effects to the extent that it is not resonant with aspects of the subject’s personality. A better way to produce a particular effect than by post-hypnotic suggestion is to explore and discover why it is difficult or impossible to produce this effect without the suggestion.

A person’s susceptibility to hypnotism is determined by the person’s ability to let go. Sometimes, not letting go is an appropriate defense, but when a person is never able to let go, this indicates a tight holding on based on a general mistrust of life.

The more one knows one’s self, namely where one is still unfree and why, the more one can help others. If the helper knows that he or she has a problem similar to the subject’s, then the help given is useful to the helper as well. A helper should have experienced his or her own psychic victories and acquired some self-assurance, and should have found the common denominator for all of his or her symptoms and problems — not as the result of an intellectual process, but as a result of the pieces falling into place as a result of doing personal growth work.

With regard to any conflict, disagreement or unpleasantness, once we find our own involvement, we will have peace.

© 2006, 2007 — All rights reserved (see first post in general orientation category).

Pathwork Lecture #066: Shame of the Higher Self

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #066:
Shame of the Higher Self

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P066.PDF

We are as ashamed of our higher selves as we are of our lower selves. This is because when we are children, regardless of what the reality of the situation may be, we feel ourselves rejected by our parents, and usually by one in particular. Our immature minds confuse the love we seek from this parent with the parent himself or herself, so that the parent, rather than merely the parent’s affection, becomes desirable. Since this parent is perceived as aloof and withholding, we conclude that it is desirable to be aloof and withholding. Thus, in addition to being guilty for not loving (guilt in relation to the lower self), we are also ashamed to love (guilt in relation to the higher self). Moreover, because of the humiliation of childhood rejection, we believe that it is humiliating to love. These mechanisms are much more responsible for withdrawal and refusal to love than is the fear of hurt and disappointment.

The above mechanisms are at work when we feel ashamed to ask or pray for something.

When the “rejecting” parent is perceived by the child as the stronger of the two in their relationship with each other, loving is perceived as weakness and rejection is perceived as desirable strength. When the rejector is perceived as the weaker parent, then the child is even more confused and conflicted. The emotional perception of the parental dynamic is more important than the intellectual perception.

Subtly, we ally ourselves, or at least would like to ally ourselves, with the seemingly stronger rejecting parent, and we reject the seemingly weaker loving parent. This is a betrayal of the best in ourselves. It is also a betrayal of the loving parent, and this betrayal cause us to have contempt for ourselves. In fact, this is usually the deepest guilt we hold, for which various other guilts are often camouflage. It causes us not to trust ourselves, and, because we generalize, not to trust anyone else. It also causes us to attract untrustworthy people.

We would do well to FIND this sense of betrayal within ourselves. We can learn by OBSERVING the way we transfer our feelings, relating to others as the “weak” giving parent or the “strong” rejecting parent, and the ways we repeat our betrayal.

The fundamental misconception is that love and humility are weakness while withholding and aloofness are strength. Finding these beliefs and the ways in which we act on them allows us to live in truth.

To the extent that we may be demonstrative, giving persons, there is still an element of falseness in this because there is still a holding back and hiding of the real self, and a superimposition of something similar but not completely genuine. All of this is unnecessary, since there is nothing to be ashamed of, as we will learn in the process of discovering the ways in which we hide and allowing our real selves to emerge.

Questions and Answers:

The conflict described in the Lecture is stronger when longing for the rejecting parent combines with Oedipal attraction to the opposite-sex parent, and more conflicted and complicated when the rejecting parent is the same-sex parent.

Sin is misconception; people behave in evil ways out of the misguided belief that this protects them (although it actually attracts negativity). Realizing this makes us able to contemplate sinfulness with detachment and without fear.

We forget about immortality when we incarnate because if we carried that awareness with us into this world, we would be much lazier about taking on the difficulty of life on Earth. However, when we gain knowledge of immortality through our efforts here, the knowledge enhances rather than diminishes our motivation to live fully.

© 2006, 2007 — All rights reserved (see first post in general orientation category).

Pathwork Lecture #065: Questions and Answers

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #065:
Questions and Answers

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P065.PDF

Outer will comes from a combination of the unconscious and various levels of the conscious mind.

On the one hand, we are compulsively unselfish to live up to standards we have internalized, in spite of a belief that being selfish would be more pleasurable. On the other hand, we are compulsively selfish in accordance with the world’s contempt for our higher impulses, which we also internalize. Thus, we feel guilty both for our selfishness and our unselfishness.

In unscrupulous people, the wish capacity functions, even though it comes from the outer will and has negative aims, because it is unimpeded. When outer will succeeds, the result does not feel so satisfying.

Praying for another is beneficial for the person praying and the object of the prayer, even though the latter may have obstructions to receiving the full benefit. The best prayer for another is that he or she receive the guidance, inspiration and insight most necessary for him or her at the moment.

Prayer is a sign of the strength to be willing to ask, not of weakness, although many of us may harbor the latter image.

Our petty internal deviations and errors are the cause of conflict and turmoil on a grand scale, and are thus as important spiritually as what happens in the larger global context. Without guilt, we should OBSERVE how our actions are parallel to those of nations. This kind of understanding and self-purification does more to create peace than many other actions.

Prayer is weakened when it is contaminated with hidden motives, and strengthened when it is combined with a deed; usually the best deed is BEING HONEST about deep hidden energies we are bringing to our prayer.

Attempting to contact the departed is fruitful when one is seeking self-development, and has no interest in which particular soul appears to help. But a motive to alleviate the pain of separation or to obtain proof of life after death should be examined. In fact, no “proof” is ever sufficient; the only way to eliminate doubt is to purify the hidden parts of the self. All doubt in God, universal law and so forth spring from doubts about the self. When doubt disappears and the loving nature of the Universe is understood, one also knows that the departed cannot have been annihilated. So the productive question to ask is why there is doubt in one’s self. Contact with spirits is in any event unnecessary, and if it does occur, one should evaluate it for its helpfulness and truth, and not relate to it as a proof. None of this means that there is anything wrong with sending thoughts to a departed soul without expectation of reciprocal contact.

Guilt is a sign that one needs to search one’s self. When guilts make no sense, they camouflage a deeper guilt with real foundations. It is important to FIND and UNDERSTAND one’s attachments to faults or weaknesses, and the underlying misconceptions which motivate these attachments. One source of guilt in this regard is the self-betrayal inherent in having a weakness. This kind of self-discovery makes it possible to let go of the attachment, and that eliminates guilt. This kind of personal work also constitutes making amends.

Being in tune with God’s ways does not require self-denial and saintliness. Rather it works to our direct advantage.

© 2006, 2007 — All rights reserved (see first post in general orientation category).

Pathwork Lecture #064: Outer Will and Inner Will; Misconcept about Selfishness

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #064:
Outer Will and Inner Will; Misconcept about Selfishness

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P064.PDF

One reason our wishes are sometimes not fulfilled has to do with the difference between inner and outer will. Outer will is tense, impatient, cramped, and anxious, whereas inner will is calm, relaxed and certain. The impatience of the outer will stems from uncertainty as to whether the desire will be fulfilled. Success depends on the influence of the inner will.

Inner will comes from the higher self through the solar plexus, while outer will, which is often grounded in immaturity, comes from both the intellect and superficial regions of the soul. The functioning of the inner will is obstructed both by the intertwining of immature and selfish motivations, and by the layers of distortion and misconception which confuse us generally and cause us to doubt ourselves. Often, we are afflicted by both compulsion and guilt.

We cannot compensate for obstructed inner will by strengthening the outer will, and our futile efforts to do so only confirm our feelings of inadequacy.

We would do well to MAKE A LIST of our desires, and gauge the energy of our will with respect to each one. Doubt, guilt or urgency are signs of outer will, and indicate a need to FIND our unhealthy motivations.

Inner will is often unconsciously blocked by a belief that what brings us happiness has to hurt someone else. Because of this misconception and the guilt it creates, we are unable to feel the difference between our truly selfish motives and our healthy desires, and so we suppress them all. Moreover, we resent the world for supposedly prohibiting our pleasure, as we keep our selfish desires from maturing by keeping them unconscious.

Our internal construct is that being selfish would bring happiness, but that the resulting external disapproval would bring unhappiness. This conundrum causes hopelessness, which we may attribute to external circumstances. We may either stifle our selfishness under a layer of compulsively-superimposed unselfishness, and thereby make ourselves unhappy, or rebel by acting out in selfish ways which provoke others, and thereby confirm our internal construct.

We would do well to dig beneath the layer of our conscious knowledge and FIND our unconscious beliefs about selfishness.

The truth is that selfishness is not advantageous. It may seem so, but only when we ignore all of its subtle effects. Seeing the bigger picture will make our desires change, but until this happens, the best we can do is to be honest about our motivations. DOING AN ACT which benefits others, without inner hope or expectation of some sort of reward (such as God’s approval), will raise our consciousness and help us see that unselfishness is in our own interest. It will give us self-respect and make us correspondingly less fearful of others. But if we are unable to act from true unselfishness, without compulsion, we need to continue exploring our motivations.

When we find that inner will is blocked, we need to FIND where we doubt the rightness of our desire, and why.

Questions and Answers:

Exhaustion is a symptom of acting from compulsion, of forcing one’s self to act a certain way. To get beyond compulsion, we have to BECOME AWARE of our unwillingness to act unselfishly, and of the reasons why — to get in touch with our rebellion against unselfishness and our guilt in relation to selfishness. In the course of the process, it is not necessary to act out from selfishness, but only to be aware. When we get in touch with our unenthusiastic compliance with what is expected from us, and our belief that doing selfish acts would bring more pleasure, we would do well to recognize that doing the seemingly unselfish act is actually a form of selfishness, since it serves to gain approval.

When we feel disturbed and anxious, it is productive to ASK, “what is it that I really wish and why do I wish it?”

© 2006, 2007 — All rights reserved (see first post in general orientation category).

Pathwork Lecture #063: Questions and Answers

Summary of Pathwork Lecture #063:
Questions and Answers

For a deeper, more rewarding experience of these teachings, consult the Lecture itself, available free of charge at: http://www.pathwork.org/lectures/P063.PDF

By following the path of purification, we honor Jesus Christ and are able to benefit from His truth, love and presence. This we should do not because we “must,” but out of a growing recognition that love and truth make us free. But Jesus’ act of love does not in and of itself make us free from our inner bonds, or remove the necessity of doing one’s own inner work, and one may understand Jesus correctly and still be in distortion. Moreover, it is possible to be liberated without accepting Christ. Eventually, however, the truth of the nature of Jesus will penetrate each developing soul organically. But faith can not be commanded, any more than love or wisdom can be, and a superimposed faith always brings with it unconscious rebellion. To put order into one’s soul, one has to EXPLORE the inner mix of faith, lack of faith and pseudo-faith.

There is a prevalent mass-image that while one “ought” not to be selfish, being selfish would bring pleasure, and that while one “ought” to be unselfish, being unselfish deprives one of pleasure. As one develops, however, one comes to learn that to harm others through selfishness is also to harm one’s self. Finding one’s true, higher self makes one happy, and this in turn brings happiness to others. However, being “unselfish” in a way that involves sacrificing one’s true happiness brings no benefit to anyone. Being true to one’s self makes one unselfish without compulsion, but also considerate of one’s own needs. Self-responsibility means only that one is responsible for one’s own choices, which is a different matter altogether from selfishness or unselfishness.

Regarding the apparent contradiction between the statement in Lecture 61 that new souls are constantly being created and a statement in Lecture 24 that new spirts are not being created pending completion of the Plan of Salvation, what was meant by the latter statement was that no new spirits are entering the individual state of existence, as opposed to the state of being, in which they are part of the great cosmic force. (Summarizer’s note: See Lecture 10, in which the Guide explains that beyond a certain stage of development, every being reaches a stage where it can dissolve itself into the divine flow and reconstitute itself as an individual entity of fine matter.) But the nature of spirit is to create, and it could not be that no new spirits were entering the state of being.

The way to increase one’s creativity is to GET TO KNOW one’s inner obstacles. However, this does not imply that creativity exists only in emotionally healthy persons. The emotionally unhealthy may have freed up creative aspects in prior incarnations, or may be capable of even more upon further development.

Sickness should not be accepted as punishment for the breaking of spiritual law. Rather, one would do well to FIND the inner desire to be sick which brought the sickness on. Such desire may, for example, have been based on a false understanding of sickness as a means to a particular end, or on may have sought sickness as an escape from what one did not wish to face, or as self-punishment which would ward off even greater punishment from outside. None of this searching precludes getting medical help for the condition.

The commandment to keep the Sabbath holy was framed as a commandment because it was directed at people whose development was crude. The meaning of the commandment is that we need a healthy balance between duties and responsibilities on the one hand, and spiritual development, pleasure and relaxation on the other. We would do well to find this balance organically, and not out of a sense of compulsion.

Whether something like space exploration is “good” or “bad” depends entirely on the motives behind it. The spirit world is very much against nuclear weapons testing, and would prefer to see energy devoted to using this power constructively.

An unpleasant experience, such as pain, can be constructive if it is approached with the right attitude.

As a general rule, spirits will not divulge to one human being what another is thinking or feeling.

Evolution theory is truer than creationism, although it leaves out important angles. Incarnated humans are in evolution, and a slow climbing back from the split of the soul into separate entities caused by the Fall.

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